We take the drugs because we denie the natural ecstacy that we are. We suppress our creativity.. we suppress the excitement of who we are by letting the pain be our focus. The pain of our self denial. The pain of looking for the beauty outside ourselves, in the validation through others. The validation through society, relation, parents, culture. And the rejection of those experiences make us doubt our beauty, make us block ourselves.
Drugs give you that excitement, that quick feel good moment that makes you crave for more because for that swift moment it connected you through your core. There are other ways that instantly connect you to yourself. Laughter and orgasm. But in the end we are looking for ways to feel good in a consistent way. To find that innerpeace, that lasting happiness and that spark of innderluck that lights your fire every day again. Giving you endless energy, passion and inspiration to act.
You have to built that by creating moments of connection on a stable basis. By creating a high frequency in ourselves that is actually connected to our inside so it will last. From that point we will start attracting this higher frequency so it will become easier to stay there. And you will do this by totally depending on yourself to feel good... you actually feel good abour YOU. Not about the drugs. You are your own drugs.
So then what's the difference by creating a feel good frequency, why not just take the drugs? Because if we look at the means we use to get to that feel good frequency.. the one is set from dependancy and the other through self love. And self love is always freedom and independancy in the sense of selfsupport.
So what do you choose? From one point you will start attracting more dependancy (the downward spiral). The other will give you indepencancy, freedom, feeling good on a stable basis and a natural regulation of this ecstacy feeling instead of trying to control feeling good by supressing the pain..(can we actually call that "feeling good" I wonder) by taking the drugs.
So in short.. grow your own ecstacy from the inside out. Built your beauty or suppres your pain. Which would you guess would feel better? In the end the latter will always be the way to rock bottom. When the feel good feeling has vanished you will crash into your pain once more and deeper. Now I'm not saying it's easy.. I am saying it's a decision. Maybe one you will have to make every day. But by being aware and givng it attention instead of turning away and fleeing into a substitute for love you are giving yourself a chance to see and discover how strong you are. Because you are...know that you are.
How do I built my beauty? We do that for example through breathing excersizes, through meditation, through following our passion, by acting on our creativity, by going to nature. Find the stillness in yourself. And every time you do this you will return to yourself a little more. Every time the connection with yourself will restore. And from that point, because of the consistency, you will slowly start to feel better until one day you will notice that the craving has faded to the background. You may hear the echos call you but you will no longer feel the urge to follow them into subjection.
Your natural feeling of ecstacy will call you to do beautiful things and you will just follow naturally. You will look back and wonder.... why in heavens name ever
you chose to look for pleasure in all the wrong places.
and if you still need them that's okay too
don't be hard on yourself
there's always a way back
release and find peace
go back to your beauty